YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE...MAYBE TWICE!
Washington (CNN) -- Never fear the night of the living dead -- the Pentagon has got you covered.
From responses to natural disasters to a catastrophic attack on the homeland, the U.S. military has a plan of action ready to go if either incident occurs.
It has also devised an elaborate plan should a zombie apocalypse befall the country, according to a Defense Department document obtained by CNN.
In an unclassified document titled "CONOP 8888," officials from U.S. Strategic Command used the specter of a planet-wide attack by the walking dead as a training template for how to plan for real-life, large-scale operations, emergencies and catastrophes.
And the Pentagon says there's a reasonable explanation.
"The document is identified as a training tool used in an in-house training exercise where students learn about the basic concepts of military plans and order development through a fictional training scenario," Navy Capt. Pamela Kunze, a spokeswoman for U.S. Strategic Command, told CNN. "This document is not a U.S. Strategic Command plan."
Nevertheless, the preparation and thoroughness exhibited by the Pentagon for how to prepare for a scenario in which Americans are about to be overrun by flesh-eating invaders is quite impressive.
A wide variety of different zombies, each brandishing their own lethal threats, are possible to confront and should be planned for, according to the document.
Zombie life forms "created via some form of occult experimentation in what might otherwise be referred to as 'evil magic,' to vegetarian zombies that pose no threat to humans due to their exclusive consumption of vegetation, to zombie life forms created after an organism is infected with a high dose of radiation are among the invaders the document outlines."
Every phase of the operation from conducting general zombie awareness training, and recalling all military personnel to their duty stations, to deploying reconnaissance teams to ascertain the general safety of the environment to restoring civil authority after the zombie threat has been neutralized are discussed.
And the rules of engagement with the zombies are clearly spelled out within the document.
"The only assumed way to effectively cause causalities to the zombie ranks by tactical force is the concentration of all firepower to the head, specifically the brain," the plan reads. "The only way to ensure a zombie is 'dead' is to burn the zombie corpse."
There are even contingency plans for how to deal with hospitals and other medical facilities infiltrated by zombies, and the possible deployment of remote controlled robots to man critical infrastructure points such as power stations if the zombie threat becomes too much.
A chain of command from the President on down along with the roles to be played by the State Department and the intelligence community for dealing with the zombie apocalypse are clearly spelled out in the document.
The training document was first reported by Foreign Policy magazine.
This is also not the first time zombies have been used as the antagonist in U.S. government training operations. Both the Centers for Disease Control and the Department of Homeland Security have used the creatures as a vehicle for training their personnel in the past.
Defense officials stress the report in no way signals an invasion of zombies is on the horizon. The only real purpose of the document was to practice how to execute a plan for handling something as large and serious a situation like flesh-eating beings trying to overrun the United States.
And why zombies?
Officials familiar with the planning of it say zombies were chosen precisely because of the outlandish nature of the attack premise.
"Training examples for plans must accommodate the political fallout that occurs if the general public mistakenly believes that a fictional training scenario is actually a real plan," the document says. "Rather than risk such an outcome by teaching our augmentees using the fictional 'Tunisia' or 'Nigeria' scenarios used at (Joint Combined Warfighting School), we elected to use a completely impossible scenario that could never be mistaken as a real plan."
So, practice for the when, where and how to plan for a more likely disaster scenario? Yes. But zombies of all stripes would be well advised to take note of this directive to Strategic Command personnel buried within the document.
"Maintain emergency plans to employ nuclear weapons within (the continental United States) to eradicate zombie hordes."
So tell me why in the hell does the Department of Defense have a Zombie Battle Plan if according to Government Officials say that a Zombie Outbreak is not possible???
and if he died. again. no word. total media sanitization. again.
Everything about the entire situation has went poof...From the truck being stolen to the attack to all the reports have totally been swept under the carpet...From what I understand, a conspiracy website believes that the man was ushered to a secret military base offshore and all those files, reports and videos have been buried in the secret mountain vault in Virginia...Mount Weather isn't just a military weather station...
i also remember something about that truck theft that also vanished from the net. the epuipment in that stolen van was used to test contaminated brain tissue. the man had died of course. but thats not the only fun fact. when it came to the remains of the man the samples came from. the mans family didnt get his remains back for almost 2 months. it only takes berween 24 to 48 hours to do a complete autopsy and toxicology screne on anyone. and when the mans family finally did get his remains back. they got cremated ashes. nothing left to have the city coroners office or any other forensic examiner to work with.
and considering all the other canibal attacks that happend afterward would tell me this. that maybe (just maybe) that stolen equipment may have been fenced to a high end drug lab. just theory mind you. but being there was nothing else to explain how they originated. to me that theory is just as good as any because drugs travel from city to city better then stolen guns do. and the other attacks didnt come out until AFTER the report of the stolen van was leaked. and being the guy that attacked and ate the homeless man had a history of theft and drug use longer then i stand tall. i cant help but think he was in on the theft of the van. but being the cop had to put one in his brain bucket. we will never know.
i can't remember if i ever weighed in on this conversation with any of you or not... but here it is anyways... i hope it's a nice counter perspective to the discussion.
the 'zombie outbreak' training scenarios started just as i was leaving the army. so while i didn't actively get to participate in them, i did have several peers that did.
if any of you have ever participated in military, LEO or government based training exercises, you will probably agree that they're fucking boring as hell. training and exercises are the second most mind numbing part of my military experience. you spend days learning clinical, sterilized information and how to apply them with the same enthusiasm as a driver's ed class. if you've served, you know EXACTLY what i'm talking about. if you haven't, ask someone who has. they'll probably ask for a beer first.
with that being said, the 'zombie outbreak' training exercises were a chance for the military and the CDC to capitalize on the zombie fad and present scenarios in a setting that participants would find interesting and exciting. because we all know that if your interest is held, you're more likely to recall what you've learned when it counts.
details such as tear gas and rubber bullets would be extremely effective against violent rioters. but if you honestly think that soldiers wouldn't employ fragmentation grenades and live ammunition against a crowd of zombies, you have a horribly misguided view of our military.
as far as what developments taking place by our government research facilities is concerned, that shit was WAY above my paygrade. but were i you, i'd be less concerned about the military/industrial complex developing a zombie virus to destabilize foreign populations and whole helluva lot more concerned about the use of sound wave technology to enforce pacification without means of detection.
just an former grunt's thoughts on the matter.
yeah, those are very valid points. however, a test run would be negated by having units drill on exercises like these.
furthermore, no unit goes into a combat zone in isolation. there are usually all manner of security forces, air support and indirect fire on standby in case the primary force engages an enemy with superior numbers/firepower. so if a military unit is deployed on american soil, you can safely bet there's a force several times larger right behind it to make sure their mission objectives are met.
additionally, while it's good to think of the military as a machine, that's sort of inaccurate. combat forces are trained and encouraged to be extremely flexible for what's referred to as 'rapidly evolving engagements'. this means that if a fight is not going as well as the ground forces want, they can modify their tactics on the fly to adapt to the situation. soldiers are taught to think outside the box. we have an axiom saying 'if it's stupid but it works, it's not stupid'.
and let's not forget the ultimate game changers- apache gunships and abrams tanks, lol. warfare is more than infantry forces, as much as it pains me to say it, lol. but it's important to look at the bigger picture to see the details of the possibilities.
i'm not saying it wouldn't be brutal as fuck. i'm just saying don't count out the guys with all the big guns and fucking tanks, haha.